Shattered Fantasies
by Liz6
Summary: Based in Season 2: Maria's life is turned upside down...(New Chapter added on July 31st)
1. Chapter 1

Maria pulled on a tight, white tank top to go with the short denim skirt and black thigh-high boots she was wearing. She stepped in front of her full-length mirror and frowned in disapproval at what she saw. How was Michael going to realize how he couldn't live without her if her hair wasn't perfect, and her shirt was the wrong color? And was that a zit forming on her temple? "Stop it," she scolded herself out loud. Over-analyzing things was something those so-called 'teen actors' with thesaurus-like vocabularies on Dawson's Creek did. Not her-no way. Michael wouldn't care about a stray hair or even a zit. That's what being a teen was about. Well, that and figuring out where you belong. Nevertheless, Maria smoothed back her hair, and fixed it up with a clip, and threw off her white tank, exchanging it for a screaming orange one. This time when she looked in the mirror, she smiled at herself in mild approval. Not much more she could do. She applied a coat of her favorite lip gloss, and grabbed a denim jacket off her bed.   
  
Maria made her way through the living room, and was halfway through the door when her mom called her. "Maria, honey, are you going out?" Amy DeLuca's voice called from the kitchen. Maria sighed.   
  
"Yeah, mom, I'm just going to the Crashdown," she called back, her voice laced with annoyance. Maria was 17 years old. It's not like she was a child, and her mom needed to know exactly where she went and when. Besides, this was Roswell, New Mexico. Nothing happened here. Well---at least nothing her mom needed to know about. It wasn't until a year ago that she even knew the danger that surrounded Roswell. "Is Sheriff Valenti coming over?"  
  
"Jim. Call him Jim, no need for formalities. And, yes, he'll be arriving really soon. Tell him to come right in," he mother smiled self-consciously. "How do I look?"  
  
Maria smiled at that. Middle age and still as self-concious as a teenager. "Great mom. I gotta go."  
  
Amy nodded. "Thanks."  
  
Maria left the house, and noticed Sheriff Valenti walking up to the front stoop.   
  
"Hello Maria," he greeted her.  
  
"Uh-hey Sher-Jim," she corrected herself. Her mom would be so proud. But he'd always be Sheriff Valenti to her...no matter what. It was weird, and made her mouth feel awkward calling him by anything else. "Mom says go right in."  
  
Valenti nodded. "So, how's everything?" She knew what he meant by everything. He meant had any thing alien happened occurred lately.  
  
"Good. Nothing's really happened lately."  
  
"You can call me if you ever...need any help. You all can."  
  
"Thanks," Maria replied, and Valenti continued his way up to the house.  
  
Maria slumped down into her tiny red jetta, and slammed the door behind her. She squeezed her eyes shut and gave a loud sigh. Not in a million years was she going to like the idea of her mother dating. It was like this wrong, foreign concept...but it was happening. At least she approved of the man. Valenti had more than proved himself by now. To think this time last year she'd been terrified of the guy! And now she completely trusted him, with her life, with her friends lives...but did she trust him with her mother?  
  
She thrust her keys into the ignition, and turned. The little car coughed weakly, and sputtered out.   
  
"No, please..." She begged softly under her breath. As if that would help. As if any miracle could happen to her. This is the last thing she needed.   
  
All her life, she'd felt surrounded in a friendly, safe atmosphere of the regular people and alien tourist traps. Just a way to scam money out of the Scully-and-Mulder wannabes. Everyone in Roswell just knew that the alien crash story was a big fat hoax. Yeah, right, sure, aliens landed here...Whatever. It seemed it would be the last place on earth that you would find a real live alien...but she had. When her best friend, Liz Parker had been shot and fatally wounded, Liz had been healed by one. Actually, it wasn't even just one. It had been 3. And then 4. And then 5...and now...who knows how many of them were walking among them? It almost scared her to think about it. Sure, Max and Isabel Evans, Tess Harding and Michael Guerin were what you might call friendly aliens...But that Nasedo gave her the creeps. And now there was these enemies, walking around, plotting to kill all the good aliens.   
  
It was not just scary, it was confusing. Like the whole 'destined to be with each other' thing. That was something none of the aliens wanted to pursue, or even think about. Except maybe Tess. Tess had shown up out of no where and was perfectly happy to steal Max away from Liz. But Max didn't want Tess. He loved Liz. And Maria loved Michael...And she knew he loved her back. He'd said so. And she's held onto that all summer when he was ignoring her phone calls and avoiding her. Making sure he was always too busy to talk to her. Most chicks would have given up by now. But she was teflon, and yeah, it hurt...but Michael was worth the fight. She had will-power and Maria was sick of him ignoring her...he was going to at least talk to her whether he liked it or not. At least they both were working tonight at the Crashdown. The alien-themed restaurant which was smack dab in the center of Roswell, and also was owned by Mr. and Mrs. Parker, Liz's parents. As soon as she was old enough, they'd offered her and Liz jobs there. Of course, she'd taken it. Good pay, good food, and working with your best friend. How could anyone say no?  
  
She cranked the ignition again, desperately hoping, praying that it might possibly work. No such luck. She sighed, and climbed out of the car. Looks like Maria DeLuca would be walking to work tonight. Not that it was bad to walk-she could use the exercise anyway. The Crashdown wasn't too far, but she was definitely going to be late for work. She glanced down at her bright yellow watch, and sighed. 15 minutes late.  
  
A warm gust of air pushed past Maria, and she shivered slightly, pulling her jacket tighter around her. The sound of her footsteps echoed softly onto the pavement of the dark, lonely street. A car passed slowly, the headlights brushing by her, then leaving her in the shadows and darkness again. Why am I so freaked? She asked herself, and then turned, looking behind her cautiously. There's nothing to be afraid of. You have walked these streets a million times, they're familiar. You know them better than the back of your hand. And nothing has ever happened to you. But that was before the Skins. The Skins-could the name be any creepier? But that's exactly what they were. They were aliens wearing human husks, or something like that. Ew. The thought of that alone, messed with her imagination.   
  
A shrill ring sounded, and Maria must have jumped a foot into the air. What was that? The ringing continued until she regained her senses and realized it was coming from her small purse. She reached into her bag, and pulled out the small black cell phone she carried with her for emergencies. Or, at least, it was supposed to be for emergencies. She had a lot of emergencies. Maria took a long deep breath as the phone continued ringing, and then flipped it on.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Where the hell are you?" Michael's rude voice said.  
  
"Well hello to you too, space boy," she snapped.   
  
"You were supposed to be here about 10 minutes ago." He stated matter-a-factly.  
  
"Since when have you cared?"  
  
"Since The Crashdown has been flooded with people, and because of you and Liz, we're short 2 waitresses."  
  
Two waitresses? Wasn't Liz working tonight too? Was something wrong? "Two? What happened to Liz?" The concern brewed in her stomach, making it do weird flip-flops.   
  
"Liz is sick, or something. Look, I don't know, just get here," he ordered and hung up. The sound of the dailtone rang in Maria's ear, and she closed her cell phone. Liz is sick? Weird. And even if she is sick, she never misses work...Oh well. Maria sighed. She'd just have to go get Liz some more echinacia. Maria's boots caught on something, and she tripped slightly, but steadied herself before she hit the ground. Who had she thought she was wearing those boots? They weren't work compatible! They were impractical, and expensive, not to mention uncomfortable. But they also made her look like she had the killer calves she'd always dreamed of. And it was worth the pain if she could achieve making Michael crazy for her.   
  
She turned the corner, onto the main strip, and saw Max's jeep parked outside of the UFO Museum. He must be at work, she thought silently. Maybe she'd stop by on her shift. But only if Michael was being a jerk-which was pretty much always. She could see Brody. Brody was great when she need a quick happy boost. It was obviously he was completely gone on her, but it wasn't mutual. She didn't love Brody. Sure, Brody was a great man. Man being the key word. The guy wasn't in high school. He wasn't even a college student. He had a daughter, and a business, and millions-or was it billions?---of dollars. She couldn't believe she'd gone so far as to thinking of marrying him! But her heart had ached so bad for him and poor Sydney. She needed to do something. And she had. Not directly of course, but Max had healed Sydney, and the other children. It was a Christmas miracle. Maybe she could go see Brody right now. It's not like Michael would really whine less if she was even later. No. No she had to go to work. Pull yourself together DeLuca, you got a long shift ahead of you...  
  
Maria entered the Crashdown to see Agnes lounging at the counter, and about a dozen people scattered around the restaurant. Okay, so Michael had exaggerated...She walked out into the kitchen. Michael was busy flipping burgers.  
  
"Where the hell were you?" He demanded, as he flipped a meat patty on the grill. It sizzled softly, a puff of smoke rising from it.  
  
She shrugged carelessly. "Car trouble."   
  
"What? I just gave you a new bumper! And I looked at the Jetta only a month ago."   
  
"I know, can you believe that? But I don't know what it was. What do you think?" she asked.   
  
Michael shook his head. "Beats me. I'll take a look at it later, okay?"  
  
"Thanks," she smiled at him. A pure, happy Maria smile. He grinned back slightly. He was being nice. Michael was being nice. This was...nice. She knew he could be civil. In fact, Michael Guerin had been actually acting half decent since Christmas when he'd surprised her with those beautiful earrings. She hadn't expected much from him. Maybe some lame gift, that she'd of course exchange. But those earrings...Wow. There was no other way to describe them...  
  
"Stop standing here, get changed," he mumbled gruffly, completely ruining the nice warm and fuzzy moment. Whatever, dude. She had other things to do than care about Mr. Mood-swings. He'd come around. It was just the whole Michael complex thing. Liz had explained it to her. Something about overcompensating to mask his insecurities...   
  
Liz. That's what she needed to do. Liz was number one priority at the moment. "Manage without me, I'm checking on Liz." She walked away, towards the stairs.  
  
"What? No!" Maria climbed the stairs that lead to the Parker household. "Maria!" She could hear Michael yelling angrily behind her. Maria smiled, and stifled a giggle.  
  
She opened the door to the Parker household. They never locked that door since it only lead into the restaurant. There was no sense ringing the bell, she was like family anyway. Maria closed the door behind herself. "Hello?" She called into the quietness. "Mr. Parker? Mrs. Parker?...Liz?"  
  
Mrs. Parker appeared from the kitchen. "Oh, Maria," she ushered her in. "Liz is in her room."  
  
"Thanks," Maria smiled, and walked through the living room where she saw Mr. Parker watching the news on the television set. The man was so absorbed with ESPN he didn't even look up.   
  
"Liz?" She called, knocking softly on the door.   
  
"Come in," came a muffled reply, and Maria entered. Liz sat up in bed, head propped up by pillow. She wore a pair of patterned pajamas, and a book lay beside her. On the bedstand sat a half full glass of orange juice.   
  
"Hey Lizzie," Maria greeted Liz cheerfully, plopping down on the bed beside her best friend. She picked up the book, and flipped through the pages quickly. Long and boring probably. That's a Liz kind of book. She turned it over to look at the front cover. "Steinback?"  
  
Liz nodded, tucking a strand if stray hair behind her ear. "Max. He loves him."   
  
Maria nodded knowingly. It was so hard for Liz, lying to Max. Giving up her true love to save everyone else. Maria was in awe of Liz, she was one courageous girl. "How's all with you and Max?"  
  
"We're...Dealing. It's hard starting again after we've been through so much together. I just want to be with him again so badly. It tears me up inside, seeing everything happen this way." Maria nodded, and hugged her friend.   
  
"Everything will be okay Liz. I know that." Liz bit her lip, and looked down. "It will, babe," Maria continued softly. "Sure, on TV the people whole are totally in love and are soulmates or whatever never work out," Maria realized she'd just delivered a blow to Liz, when a pained expression crossed the other girl's sad face. Still, Maria continued. "But you know, it's different with you and Max. Nothing fabricated by some writer can compare to what you guys have. What you'll always have. You and him are made for each other, and are going to be together eventually, whether you lie to him or not."  
  
"I hope you're right," Liz replied softly. But she defiantly didn't look convinced. In fact, she looked to be ready to start crying uncontrollably.   
  
"How are you feeling?" Maria asked, hoping a quick change in subject would help.  
  
"Awful," Liz admitted. "But I'll be okay." She glanced at the clock. "Don't you have work?"  
  
Maria nodded, a sly grin playing on her lips. "A while ago."  
  
"Maria!" Liz cried in that tone, making Maria swear that Liz was somehow her mother's long-lost twin.   
  
"Alright, Alright!" Maria raised her body off the bed, and stretched. "You got me. I'm going. You have fun with your book. And keep your mind off the Max deal."  
  
Liz nodded. "I will," she promised Maria solemnly. Though, it was impossible to follow through, Maria knew that, she wasn't stupid. "Thanks Maria."  
  
"Bye Liz," Maria called, exiting her friend's room, and quietly slipping out of the house, down to the Crashdown Café.  
  
Maria approached a middle-aged gentleman at table 6, with an I'm-a-happy-waitress smile across her mouth. She pulled out the alien head pen and order book from the front pocket of her uniform's apron. "Hi, welcome to The Crashdown, what can I get for you?"  
  
The man looked up, directly at Maria. Then his eyes looked at her, up and down. Gross. Maria did her best not to shudder. Okay, creepy guy, 12 o'clock, she thought inside her head. It was so icky when the middle aged men checked her out. But it happened a lot. Thank God that most of them didn't take it farther. Occasionally one of particularly perverted men would hit on her, or say something quite crude, but mostly they were just tourists passing through, looking for a little eye-candy. That's what she was to them. It totally made her feel all gross and dirty, but what could she do?  
  
"Do you want to hear our specials?"  
  
The man cleared his throat loudly, and glanced at the menu. "N-no, I'll just have," he coughed. "I'll have a cup of coffee."  
  
Real specific buddy. Obviously he wasn't into the cheesy alien-themed nicknames or he would have asked for an Alien jolt. Or, whatever coffee was called lately. "Regular or Decaf?"  
  
"Regular."  
  
"Okay, anything else I can get you sir?" Maria asked politely. Even if he was a perv, she had to be polite. After all, tips were nice. Tips are always good. But there was something vaguely familiar about this man. Like she'd met him before. Maybe he'd come to the café a long time ago? Whoever he was, he sure seemed nervous. It was just coffee, nothing to get nervous about. Any second now it looked as if the guy would start shaking. Coffee was probably the last thing he needed.  
  
"No," he smiled briefly, and then glanced out the window. Maria rolled her eyes, and started off towards the kitchen to grab the coffee pot.   
  
After her shift was over, Maria walked home, down the same streets she'd walked there when she'd being traveling to the Crashdown. The same familiar feelings gripped her, and her stomach did an uneasy flip-flop. She sped up a little, hoping to get home before her imagination got the better of her. She turned and glanced behind her, and sped up a little bit more. The creepiness feeling grew...And suddenly she had collided with something.  
  
Not something. Someone. The jolt knocked her purse down to the ground. "I'm sorry," she exclaimed, "I wasn't looking." She didn't look at the person as she bent down to pick up her scattered belongings.  
  
"No, I'm sorry" the man replied. He kneeled down to help her. Maria glanced at him, and was shocked to see the man who had been drinking a years supply of coffee earlier that night. She stared at him for a moment, and then tore her gaze away to stuff her things into her purse, then stood quickly. It was bad enough that the roads were freaking her, now coffee man was here too. And why did he still look do familiar?  
  
He rose and handed her a small pink hairbrush which she shoved into her bag. "Thanks," she mumbled. That man was just so familiar. "This is, uh, really weird, I know, but...Do I know you from someplace?" She asked, her curiosity getting the better of her.  
  
The man nodded slowly. "Maria," he started. How did he know my name? The thought plowed into her head. Then she realized she had been wearing a name tag. But she could never have been ready to hear what he had to say next. "I'm your father."  



	2. Chapter 2

She felt her jaw drop. She was dumbfounded. This was a lie. This was unreal. It wasn't real. It couldn't be. I'm in a dream, a very scary, very realistic dream. One in which I will wake up from very, very soon. "N-no. No you're not. My father is...Well I don't know. But you're not him."  
  
"Yes, I am," he reached towards her slowly, but Maria backed away startled. "I have to talk to you."  
"I can't...No." She mumbled, her eyes wide. She didn't know what to do. She had to get away though, thats all she could think of.   
  
Maria walked away, leaving him standing there. She was so confused. Her father. Her father. The concept was...well, weird. She'd always pictured him as taller. And maybe a little bit handsomer. And of course, in all her escape fantasies he always had a limo and was a millionaire and he'd come to take her and her mom away from Roswell. She'd talked to Michael about this last year. They'd bonded over it. She'd always thought there was something better out there for her than Roswell, New Mexico. But now she wasn't so sure that she wanted to see her dad. Ever. Well, that was out of the question because if this man really was her father, and he wanted to talk to her...Then she'd probably end up talking to the guy.  
  
Maria rammed her key into the front door of her house, and turned it, opening the front door. She went inside, and without turning on the lights, she walked through the living room and down the hallway to her bedroom. She closed the door behind her and changed quickly into her pajamas. Then she crawled into bed and let the tears out. She weeped freely, until her body could cry no more. She felt tired as sleep crept up and overwhelmed her.   
  
"Maria," squealed six year old Liz. "Your dad's here!" She announced happily. Maria felt a smile on her lips, and her heart jumped happily.   
  
"Where?" She asked, playing with one of her sandy blond braids. Liz pointed out the window excitedly. Maria rushed to the large window to look outside, and took in the site her little eyes saw. She rushed outside and into his arms.  
  
He hugged her tightly. Maria beamed up at him, the joy overflowing in her heart. "I have a surprise for you honey," he said mischievously. He stepped forward, revealing a huge black stretch limousine behind him.   
  
Maria gasped, he clutched her small hand in his as the chauffeur opened the door for them. "I missed you." She whispered softly.  
  
He grinned back. "I tried to come back sooner, but I was busy."  
  
Maria's heart dropped. Busy? "Doing what, daddy?" she dared to ask. What could have been more important than his daughter?  
  
His grin turned into a smirk, and the doors locked instantly. Maria's heart raced, what was going on? The car filled with bright white light as her father shifted into a green figure with a huge head and large, lifeless eyes. The typically cliched alien. He reached a bony finger towards her. "Killing people of course," he said, his voice coming from somewhere other than a mouth. Because there was no mouth on this...this creature.   
  
The terror that Maria felt escalated, and she screamed terrified. She pounded on the window of the car furiously. "Help me!! Help!" She cried out. She felt the stick-like fingers on her shoulder and..  
  
Maria awoke in a cold sweat, her eyes wide, and her heart beating fast. Too fast. She'd had that dream before. In fact, she'd been having that dream for years. Except it never had been like that. Her father had never been an alien. Instead, they'd had ice cream, and she'd become a princess in his castle. Juvenile, she knew, but that's the dream she'd been having since she was in first grade. And that dream had been the one in which she'd found an idealistic for her father. One that he obviously could not live up to. He'd fallen off the pedestal. But that dream-was just too...Unsettling.  
  
She rubbed her face, and then rolled over, looking onto her nightstand. The clock read 2:42. As in 2:42 am. She tried to go back to sleep, but there was no way that that was possible. Not after something like that. Tears streamed down her face. She reached for the telephone, and slowly dialed the memorized phone number. It rang a few times until it finally was picked up.  
  
"What?" Michael mumbled tiredly into the telephone angrily.   
  
"Michael," was all she said.   
  
"Maria?" He asked his tone grew much softer. He could feel that something was wrong. Her voice didn't sound right, and besides it was 3 o'clock in the morning! "What's wrong?"  
  
"Can I come over?"   
  
"Of course," he answered. Thank God was all that she could think. If she'd had to spend another minute alone she'd probably have gone crazy.  
  
"Thanks," she relied quietly, hanging up the phone onto it's cradle and slowly climbed out of bed. She threw on a pair of jeans and a top, this was no time for glamour. She didn't want to deal with glamour. She could look like hell, after all, that's how she felt.  
  
Fifteen minutes later she arrived at Michael's apartment. She knocked on the door quietly, and he opened right away. He wore a white wifebeater and a pair of black boxers. That was it. Maria shook away her interest in Michael's attire-or lack thereof. That was defiantly not why she was there. He looked concerned, like he'd been waiting for her anxiously. Because he had, she thought happily. He cares. His eyes were a mixture of curiosity and sadness, and he stood there silent. Waiting for her to speak. To explain. But she didn't. She just collapsed into his waiting arms.  
  
Michael held her closely, letting her sob into his shoulder. No explanation to him, but he didn't seem to care. He stroked her hair softly, whispering about how things were going to be okay. But they weren't. Not for her---not really. He took her hand and they walked over to the couch and sat. Michael still held her safely in his arms.  
  
"I'm sorry," she choked out, pulling away from his embrace.  
  
He shook his head, and smiled gently at her. She didn't need to apologize to him. "Do you want to tell me what happened?" So Maria told him about everything. He listened quietly, not saying anything until she was completely done.  
  
"Your father?" Michael said, amazed. "Wow." Maria nodded her agreement.  
  
"I feel stupid. Here I am, whining about how my father's come back to talk to me, and you---you don't...well, you know." She felt so stupid! Poor little Maria, now has two parents to deal with. This must be awful for him.  
  
Michael shook his head gravely. "No, you're not stupid. You have every right to be upset." He kissed the top of her head.   
  
"Thank you," she smiled softly. She was beautiful. He couldn't let her be hurt so much...How could anyone do this to her?   
  
"Do you want to stay here? It's morning anyway," he offered. Maria nodded in acceptance. "You can have the bed, I'll take the couch."   
  
Maria shook her head. "Can't...I mean, can't we just, sleep? I want you to stay with me. Will you?"  
  
Michael smiled. And Maria felt her mouth turn up too. He could be so tender when he wanted to be. "Sure." Maria lay down on the couch, and Michael lay beside her, holding her in his arms, reminiscent of the time when she'd invited him into her bedroom the year before. Soon they both fell asleep.  
  
The light filtered into Michael's apartment through a window with blinds half-closed and Maria could feel it was morning. Early, granted, but still morning. Even before her eyes were open. Michael lay beside her, holding her gently. She smiled slightly, enjoying the moment. The feel of his safe arms around her, the sound of his breathing. In and out, in and out, very evenly...It was wonderful. Her eyes fluttered open and then her fantasy world came crashing down. The confusion and sorrow of last night invaded her stomach, causing her to feel almost nauseous.   
  
She stood slowly, and shivered slightly from the early-morning chill. She hugged herself tightly. She glanced down at Michael longing to be in those warm arms again. But it didn't matter. He wasn't even awake. Was he? She peered at him, and noticed that he didn't really seem asleep.  
  
"Michael?" She whispered. No answer. "Michael?" She asked a little louder.  
  
"What?" He opened his eyes and asked, his voice lacking the sharpness that was usually Michael Guerin's style.   
  
"How long have you been awake?"  
  
"A while," he admitted, an embarrassed grin briefly flickered across his face. Maria felt her heart pound harder. He'd been watching her sleep. He was so...so...cute. Yeah, okay, Michael wasn't usually classified as cute. It's not like he was cute like a kitten, or a baby. But this was an exception. She smiled at him in silence, basking in the moment they were having. "Uh-We should...Get you home ," he muttered, shattering it all. Leave it to spaceboy to ruin something.  
  
She nodded. "Yeah. Um...I should go home, get changed."   
  
It was his turn to nod. "I'll give you a lift." Maria smiled.  
  
"Okay."  
  
Michael stopped the motor bike on the curb in front of her house, and Maria jumped off, and handed him her helmet. She stood there, silently for a moment and then bit her lip nervously.  
  
"So..." He said, awkwardly.  
  
"Yeah...Uh, thank you for the ride," she replied lamely.   
  
"Sure." She gave him a little half smile and turned towards his house. Michael watched as she walked away. Then she turned, and ran back to him.  
  
"Michael?"   
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Thank you." She kissed him. Little electric bolts shot through her, and she could feel his heart, the pulse beating rapidly. They hadn't kissed in a long time...But she'd never forgotten how it'd felt. She never would. And it was this. It was wonderful. Deliriously intoxicating, like she was floating on air. Cheesy, but true. The kiss was soft at first, but it grew more intense by the second. Sweetness turned into lust, and she could feel Michael's warm hand, reaching up under her shirt. Their tongues entwined together, and Maria's knees felt weak. All she could think about was Michael. All the cluttered thoughts and feelings were pushed aside while they kissed. All there was was them. It was extraordinary. But this wasn't right. It couldn't be. She needed to get away. She had to...She couldn't be kissing him breathless without asking him. She slowly gained control of the rest of her motor functions, and pulled back quickly. "We can't," she said, her tone apologetic and longing.  
  
"What?" He asked, not getting just why they couldn't. His voice was laced with a little irritation. Why couldn't they? It's not like there was anyone outside at this time in the morning to watch their make-out fest.  
  
"What are we?" She demanded. A look of confusion crossed his face. "Are we friends, are we together? What are we?"  
  
Michael shrugged. "I don't know. Whatever."  
  
Whatever? Whatever?! Of course thats how the boy would choose to define the relationship. One word. But this time it was good. Because that technically meant he was giving her the choice.   
  
"Together," she replied smugly, kissing him again, this time more restrained. She after all, had to get a shower. And, oh yeah, think about the whole thing with her father. A pang stabbed her stomach, making her feel all bad inside. Emotional turmoil and pure bliss were getting her all mixed up, and she had to set her priorities straight. She pulled away, and bit her lip again.  
  
"Are you okay?" He asked her softly, and tucked a strand of her long hair behind her ear. She nodded.  
  
"Yeah. I will be...Are you coming to school today?" Her eyes pleaded. He had. Say yes, say yes, say yes, say yes....  
  
"If you are," he replied.  
  
"Yeah. Okay," she kissed him one last time, "bye."   
  
He grinned at her, and pulled on his helmet, started the motor bike and drove off down the road. She then turned and walked up her front stoop. Before her hand could reach the doorknob, the door was flung open by her mother.  
  
"Maria, get in here right now," Amy demanded angrily. She stood there in a blue bathrobe looking somewhat haggard, and older than she should. She even had on the typical 'mom' slippers, they were blue as well, and fuzzy.   
  
And so it unfolded. Her mother giving her the sex talk. Again. As if Maria even had time to think about Michael and sex. She'd been too busy pouring her guts out to him. Whatever.  
  
"What were you thinking?" Her mother asked quietly from her spot at the kitchen table. She looked up at her daughter, pain in her eyes.  
  
"I don't know," Maria mumbled softly, making invisible patterns on the table with her finger. Anything to avoid looking at her mom. Maria had made up her mind not to tell her mother about her father. Her mom was dating the sheriff, she'd moved on. The last thing she needed was to see her ex-husband, and have the return of all the feelings that accompanied him.  
  
"A-are you at least using protection?" Her mom asked, her voice strained.   
  
Maria looked up her eyes widening. She wasn't..? "Mom, I'm not hav-"  
  
"That sure as hell wasn't what it looked like! You aren't there when I wake up, and I find you with your tongue jammed down some boy's throat, on our front lawn at 5:30 in the morning!"  
  
"You're right mom, I am having sex," Maria snapped, rolling her eyes.  
  
"Don't use that tone. This isn't funny. That boy-"  
  
"He's not just some boy, mom," Maria cried. "You know him, you know his name, its Michael!"  
  
"That's what scares me," Amy sighed heavily. "I found him in your bed not even a year ago, you've taken off with him before, without so much as telling me you're leaving. A-and now you're sneaking off to see him at all hours," She rose from her chair, staring down at her daughter sternly.   
  
"Mom..."  
  
"I'm putting you on birth control, Maria."  
  
"I'm not sleeping with him," Maria protested again.  
  
"I can't stop you from doing whatever you're doing...But you could have come to me, honey." A tear fell down her mother's face. "You even hid that you two were dating. You didn't need to lie," she said weakly. Maria got up and wrapped her arms around her mother.  
  
"Mom...I'm sorry...I can't explain why I was with Michael." She bit her lip. She might as well save her mother from finding out about her ex-husband. The divorce hadn't really been a great one. "Michael and I are together, again. But not like that. We've never been together like that. And if you can't believe me then...I guess you can't." She smiled at her mother, and Amy smiled back, meekly. Not quiet believable. Maria shook it off, thats about as best as she'd get with her right now. "Come on, I'll make us breakfast."  
  
As Maria flipped a pancake, she chatted nonchalantly. Both of them wanted to forget what had happened earlier this morning. The phone rang, and started towards it to answer it. Amy shook her head. "Nah, let the machine pick up."  
  
Maria nodded, and returned to flipping.  
  
"Hi! You've reached Amy and Maria DeLuca, we can't come to the phone right now, leave a message at the beep..." Amy's pre-recorded message on the machine said. It beeped and a man cleared his throat.  
  
"Amy, it's John. Pick up the phone, I need to talk to you."  
  
Amy stared at the phone startled. It couldn't be...Maria looked frantically at the machine and then at her mother. No..."Uh...I'll get it if you want, mom?" She offered.  
  
"N-no...No I think I'd better," her mom replied quickly.  
  
"Mom..."  
  
"No! I mean, no. No, I'll get it." Amy reached for the phone and picked it off the cradle. "John?" She said weakly into the receiver. The dial tone was her only response.  



	3. Chapter 3

Maria walked to school. It was the first time since she'd gotten her license that she'd had to walk. It was actually better, anyway. She didn't need to drive with all these things going on with her. She'd probably run over something or someone that way.   
  
It had been odd morning. First the talk with her mom, then her father phoning and her mom acting all weird after that. Maria just pretended she didn't realize, she didn't mention it, her mom didn't mention it. That's the way a lot of things happened in the DeLuca household. So to avoid the awkwardness, she'd gotten ready for school, and gotten herself out of there as soon as possible.   
  
The walk wasn't lengthy, just a few blocks. It had only taken her about 15 minutes to reach the high school. She gazed down at her watch. Perfect. She could find Liz, maybe have a serious girl-talk while copying the homework which she hadn't done for Trig class. She opened her locker, and a small, white, folded piece of paper fell to the ground. She looked at it curiously, then leaned over to pick it up. She flipped it open. "The Crashdown. 3:30pm. I need to talk to you." it read. She knew who it was from. Her stomach twisted, and she suddenly was thrashed by a wave of emotions. She looked up, and glanced around the fairly empty hallways. When had her father been here? It's not like he was here now. It was stupid to be looking around. She folded the note carefully, and shoved it into her pocket. Now how was she going to concentrate on school when she had something like this going on?   
  
She closed her eyes, and rested against the row of closed lockers. All this was just so...stressful. She really needed that cedar oil right about now. Too bad she'd left it at home in her mad rush to get to school.   
  
Maria took the folded note out of her pocket, and opened it once again. She stared down at the small sheet of paper, her eyes boring holes into it. This was...unbelievable.  
  
"What's that?" Michael asked, beside her. She jumped, startled.   
  
"Michael!" She gasped, surprised. "Oh, um...it's nothing," she replied, regaining her composure. "Nothing," she repeated quietly, as if trying to convince herself of it.  
  
"Maria.." He replied his tone unbelieving. He reached for the slip of paper, which she let him take. She watched his eyes as he scanned it quickly, he stomach twined unnaturally the whole time. His eyes then rose to look up at her, then back down at the paper.   
  
"What do I do?"  
  
"I don't know," he said, handing the note back to her. "But if you're going to see him, I'm coming with you."   
  
Maria nodded, and mustered a small grin. Then she hugged him to her. She needed supportive Michael right now, thank god this wasn't taking place during one of his particularly anti-social moments.  
  
Michael tensed. He wasn't used to public displays of affection. Sure, the whole school probably knew about Guerin and DeLuca's on-again off-again relationship. Hell, they'd even kissed once or twice in the hallways. But it had been a while. He eased himself, releasing the tension, settling in to hold her gently.   
  
Liz's expression was one of shock. Maria sat on top on the counter, scrawling down last night's homework in her black binder. While Liz leaned against one of the metal stalls, a beam of sunlight hitting her face, accentuating the features. It was a sunny room due to the windows, but unfortunately it was painted a monotone blue color, with concrete flooring, leaving it with a cold, hard feeling.   
  
"Wow," was all Liz could say. Quietly, at that.  
  
Maria nodded. "A-and I'm just so confused, Liz. My Dad...I've been wanting this for my entire life! A dream come true. But then...then why does it feel like someone's died?"  
  
Liz shook her head. "I'm sorry, Maria..." She slid off the counter, and wrapped her arms around the other girl.   
  
Maria sighed. "Michael's going to come with me. After school today. I could really use you too, babe. Moral support, you know?"  
  
Liz nodded. Poor Maria. "Of course I'll be there." Second bell rang shrilly, summoning them to class once again. "If you need to talk or anything, you know I'm here."  
  
Maria nodded. "I know, thank you."  
  
  
Science, Maria's most dreaded class. She sighed heavily in the dark, staring blankly at the small dingy television screen. It was droning on and on about all these chemicals with hard names. Sodium Phosphate, Hydrogen Monoxide, all the fun ones on the periodic table. No one was paying attention around her. Kyle sat beside her at the workstation, her assigned partner for the year. Ah yes, the joys of general level science.   
  
She couldn't concentrate. Not on the video, not on school, not on anything. Her brain was stuck, frozen on one single thought. Her father was back, and he wanted to see her. Why did he want to see her? He'd never wanted to before, and now, one day he suddenly had the urge? It just didn't make sense. And why the crypticness? Couldn't he have just told her what was going on? It's not like---   
  
She felt a shove coming from her right side. She turned to Kyle, her face stricken in irritation. "What?" She whispered loudly. He just raised his eyebrows. And then she noticed the whole class was staring at her. And the lights were on. One particular set of eyes were on her-Mr. Segielmen's.   
  
"So good of you to rejoin us, Maria," he said his tone exasperated. She had just completely been spacing. She felt a hot blush cover her face. "Now would you like me to repeat the question?"  
  
"Actually, could I get a hall pass, please?" Her eyes pleaded with him. It was almost the end of the class anyway. He looked at her for a moment, as if evaluating the situation, then he nodded curtly.  
  
"Go compose yourself, Miss DeLuca, and when you return tomorrow, I expect your full and undivided attention."  
  
He wrote out the pass, and she snatched it out of his hand, muttering a quick thanks, grabbing her belongings and dashing out of the classroom. At least the man had the decency to let her out. The only problem-how the hell was she supposed to concentrate in the rest of her classes?  
  
The shrill ring of the bell sounded that class was over. She slid closer to the wall as the halls were flooded by the entire student body of West Roswell High School. It was her period for lunch, and she was meeting Michael in the quad for a talk. But knowing Michael it would be anything but chat. She saw him, walking towards her, but not seeing her, his eyes darting around, searching. She knew he was looking for her.   
  
"Michael!" Maria yelled from the other side of the hallway. He turned, and grinned. His grin was so sexy, and charming. It was a private grin, reserved for her. Only her. Michael never smiled at anyone that way. Hell-he barely smiled at all. He pushed through the hoards of teens dividing them to get to Maria. And she decided right there and then that a distraction was exactly what she needed, something to do other than get lost in thought. It was her only form of escape, really.   
  
"Michael," she sighed her tone sullen, he slipped his arm casually around his waist as they continued down the hall.   
  
"What? What's wrong?" His eyes concerned.   
  
Maria slipped out of his grasp, to stand in front of his. She pulled his face in his hands and thrust her mouth on his, kissing him long and hard. Intensely. He ripped his mouth away from hers, his eyes surprised.  
  
"Maria?" He asked softly. She took his hand, and looked around the halls cautiously. They had basically emptied in the matter of 30 seconds. Most people had class, or were eager to get to lunch, only a few loitered in the hallways, not really paying attention to them.  
  
She pulled him into the eraser room, closed the door, and shoved him against the wall forcefully, and sealed the space between them, kissing him hardly. She pulled back briefly to glance up at him and he opened his mouth to speak. Instead, he was greeted with Maria's mouth again. She automatically deepened their kiss, their started dueling lustfully. He mumbled her name against her lips, half moaning half questionable. Michael's hands weaved and tangled through her hair as the kiss grew deeper.   
  
His mouth moved to her throat, she could feel the burn of them against her skin, and sighed happily as he nipped at the skin near the hollow of her neck. Now her hands were entwined in his hair, messing up the attempted gel-job of this morning.  
  
Michael slid his hand up the back of her shirt, his cool hand against her skin sending a sudden chill through her body. His hand massaged the small of her back, and Maria gasped slightly. "Maria," he muttered again, his voice sounding distant. It felt so good what they were doing, what she was doing.  
  
"Michael," she replied, kissing his mouth again, letting their tongues collide and caress each other. "Oh God, Michael," she mumbled as his hand continued to search the bare of her back. She was lost in the kiss, as they found their rhythm, their tongues moving together. And then, then it was ripped away.  
  
Michael took a step back, and she heard him let out a long hiss of air. Obviously doing so was just as hard on him as it was on her. She crossed her arms, suddenly feeling cold without Michael around her. She looked into his eyes and saw him staring right back at her, wordlessly. She bit her lip and stepped up to him again.   
  
"Maria, no. We can't be doing this right now," he told her softly.   
  
Maria's mouth turned into a vexed pout. "Why not?" she asked, her eyes pleading. He said nothing, just looked at her with those eyes. And Maria needed for him to say something, she felt uncomfortable with the way she was looking at her. It was as though he needed for her to validate her reason for needing this. Didn't he know? Couldn't he tell? "I need something to do," she admitted. "God, Michael, do you know its like?" she challenged. "T-To have something so big on your shoulders, and not know what to do. To worry about it every single second, unable to concentrate on anything else?"   
  
He looked down and a wave of guilt swept over her. Of course he knew. He lived with that every single day of his life. What the hell was wrong with her?! She kicked herself silently, and slid her hand up to cup his face. "Hey," she soothed. "I...I'm sorry, I didn't mean..." she trailed up as his eyes rose to meet hers.  
  
"I know," he nodded, offering her a lopsided grin. "It's okay."   
  
"I don't want to go face them," she admitted. Them being their group, who Liz had no doubt filled in with Maria's situation. She didn't need their questions, nor their sympathetic glances. She needed to take her mind off this! "Please?" Her eyes pleaded again. His eyes softened, no doubt in pity. Okay, so she didn't need pity, but sometimes it worked in her favor.  
  
Maria once again stepped forward to her boyfriend and this time he let her place a firm hand on the back of his neck, and bring her mouth up his to kiss it again in a simple, soft kiss.   
  
  
"Maria, are you sure?" Michael asked, stopping her before she entered the Crashdown by blocking the door. "You don't have to do this."  
  
"I know," she bit her lip nervously. But she needed to do this. Maria gently pushed Michael. "Get out of my way, Guerin, I'm going in." She attempted to sound playful, but failed miserably. All she sounded was scared.   
  
Michael snaked his arm around her shoulders, and they opened the infamous door to the Crashdown. The door jingled with the familiar notes, and she glanced over to see a booth on the left occupied by of her friends. She waved at them silently, not bothering to go over to them. Instead she had her sights on the lone man sitting at the back of the café, close to the kitchen. Her...Dad? What a foreign word in her vocabulary.  
  
She turned to look back at Michael again, needing his assuring face. He met her expectations, and she let a small grin tug at her lips. "Do you want me to come with you?"  
  
She shook her head no. This was something she had to do herself, as much as she hated to admit it. He understood, she could tell by the way he looked at her, and then kissed her lightly on the forehead. She wrapped her arms around his neck in a tight hug. She could feel his breath by her ear, warm and reassuring. "I love you," he whispered almost so softly she didn't catch it.   
  
"I love you too," she choked out. He kissed her one more time, this time quickly on the lips, and then pushed her towards the end of the café.   
  
"Go."  
  
And she did, she walked hesitantly down the aisle, trying to regain her composure. She was Maria DeLuca, kick ass teflon girl. Whatever this guy had to say she could take it, no sweat. In fact whatever he had to say to her would be nothing compared to some of the things she had faced since that fateful day in this very same café two years before. Maria swallowed the lump in her throat, darted a glance back at Michael, and then approached. His eyes lit up as he noticed her, and she drifted hers away, avoiding him.   
  
"Hi," she said sliding into the booth which her father currently occupied.   
  
"That your boyfriend?" He asked, cocking his head towards Michael who was attempting to look busy talking with Alex, but instead his eyes had traveled right over to their table. Maria decided he must have seen the exchange between her and Michael at the door.   
  
Maria nodded. "Yeah, and my friends." She followed his eyes as they rested on each one, and then on Liz. She noticed the look of realization on his face. He knew the brown haired girl. It's not as if Liz had changed all that much since she was 7 years old.   
  
"Is that, Liz Parker?" He asked awkwardly. She nodded again.  
  
He let out a sigh. "She's so old..." He fell silent for a moment, his eyes shifting down to the table top, tracing graffiti with his index finger slowly. "You're so old." His eyes raised up to her again. She could see the pain in them. But she wasn't going to offer him anything. Nothing at all. This was after all, the man who had stranded her as a little girl. And that frankly pissed Maria off. "You're so beautiful, you know. So much like your mother when I met her."   
  
A blush crept up on Maria's face and she struggled to keep her mouth straight. That was not what he was here for. She knew it, and he knew it. There had to be a reason, and he just needed to cut the bullshit with her. "Is there a point to this little rendezvous?" She finally choked out.  
  
He nodded. "Yes."  
  
"Then spit it out, because I have work to do." This registered nothing on his face. And she wanted to feel bad. To wish he had experienced his daughter's life, to envy all that knew her better than he. She wanted him to know that she was just fine before he showed up in her life again. She wanted him to feel painful guilt in the pits of his stomach, in the back of his mind. "I have friends," She started. "Tons of great friends, who care about me. A boyfriend who I love, and mom...Mom she...We just don't need you. My life is great, it's perfect. So whatever you're here for you might as well get it out of the way so that you can just leave again and-"  
  
"Maria," he interrupted sternly. She quieted, looking up at him, fiery emotion burning in her eyes. Bring on the blow-out, she thought angrily. She could take it, she was ready for anything he threw at her. "I'm dying." Except that.  
  
  
  
*Note: Hey everyone. I'm sorry it took so long to get this part out, but I've been having some severe writers block, and also work this summer has kept me really busy. I am feeling really unmotivated to finish this story, but I might be persauded with a little feedback, or some suggestions. Just leave a response, or e-mail me at Jujubes06@aol.com. Thanks! ~ Liz 


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